Cosa Nostra News: 'Mob Wives' Ep1 -- All About Renee

FROM THE EDITOR-IN-CHIEF

The party may have been a celebration of Renee's life -- her ego is so massive, I mean who else would throw an "I am alive" party? -- but that party was also a carefully calculated ambush to catch Drita alone (Carla had been banned) by Karen Gravano, and her nutty brainless sidekick Rizzo, Lefty Ruggiero's granddaughter.

Renee's phoniness is so evident I wonder if it needs to be pointed out, but for those who missed it, first, she tells Drita to stay away from Karen at her party, then, after an embarrassingly slutty display of her artificially thinned out yet oddly unappealing thighs, what does she do? Grab the mic and call up front all her "girls," which Drita clearly was not into.

But when Drita disappeared on the terrace to avoid confronting Karen and her sidekick Rizzo, they sent Big Ang after her. Big Angie looks like the female equivalent of Luca Brasi. I know guys who would run from her. Nevertheless, she seems very nice and caring, despite appearances, but she was feeding the fire of the feud between Drita and Karen & Co. (Ang also sounds eerily like Harvey Firestone, if you know who he is.)

Okay -- let's back it up, start at the beginning and carefully read between the lines. There are two layers to this show -- the obvious one, and the covert one, where producers and writers mettle with the dynamics in order to create beats, plot points, controversy, with the express purpose of keeping ass in chairs, eyes front, when the show is on. We don't blame this setup; it is the basis for all "reality" TV.

Clearly, most of the hour of episode one of season two was focused on Renee's fat ass. She had a fully body liposuction procedure, in which her own fat was sucked out of her and pumped back inside, only for the return trip it was strategically placed.

However afterward, Renee being Renee, she accidentally ripped her stitches open and, in her words, almost bled to death. I have my doubts about how serious her injuries were. First of all, we saw her slide up on the bed in the clinic and yell in pain (she'd been crying and moaning the whole time). I saw no blood spilling onto the floor. I saw no red at all. And notice how the film was carefully sped up so that the one, two or three nurses present seemed to be moving a lot faster -- and therefore looked like they were working on Renee fast and furious when in reality they were not; it was the film, sped up.

She later said she ended up in the hospital for 16 days.

I challenge Renee here and now to offer medical proof of her situation. I just don't believe it was as bad as she made it seem. (If she lost 6.3 pints of blood, that is more than half the blood in her body.)

I believe this was her way of 1.) creating drama to get more attention (even her own son doesn't want to hug her anymore); and 2.) creating enemies by observing how her "friends" react to her. That is always how it is with Renee; others are not people, they are simply beings that rotate around her and their worth is based solely on how much they show they love and care about Renee.

Renee is also the worst judge of character. I wonder if Junior was wired up when she was going on about how loyal he was to her (while getting her 70-year-old dad tossed back in prison). He must not have been wearing the wire, though, or he never would've let anyone hug him.

I did not feel a single bit sorry for Renee until she quite clearly -- and this was one of the bravest things anyone has done on the show, as far as I am concerned -- quite clearly admitted she's been suffering from depression for 20 years.

But that is still no excuse for the set up.

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